Saturday, 27 December 2014

Goodbye 2014! Hello 2015!

Hello everyone!

Hope you all had a fabulous Christmas!-My Christmas was amazing we had some family over and it was just a really nice relaxing Christmas!-I can't believe its already over! I cant believe how fast his year has gone-it doesn't feel like yesterday I as leaving school and then finishing exams and my sixteenth birthday then end of summer and start at college and now end of the year! So much has happened this year I can't believe how fast its all gone!

What has happened this year?

I went to London with my parents in the new year and saw WICKED in theatres which was incredible! 
I went to see Mcbusted in concert on the 4th May and then on the 31st May I went to see ONE DIRECTION in concert in Mancaster with my best friend! I loved both those concerts and they were incredible and I hope I get to see them both again! 
I finished my GCSEs and finished school! I am proud of my GCSE results as I d my best and for me I got incredible results (but I am not telling you, due to this blog being anmyomous ;) but I will tell you I got a C In maths and physics! Still don't know how I did this!!!) 
Had the most awesome summer holiday ever! I went to Florida with my parents and went to universal studios and went to Harry potter world- went to diagon alley the day after it opened brand new! I also on this holiday in Florida got to go to disney world Hollywood studios on my sixteenth birthday! Then came back from Florida relaxed and super tanned! Went to the cinema loads and hung out with my awesome friends! My best friend had a BQQ/house party/camp in her back garden which was awesome! I has such a awesome funday at horse riding! I moved to a big horse and got over my fear and rode bareback (only thanks to my awesome friend who helped me so much and if you are reading this then here is a shoutout to you-thank you (again) for helping me! :) Your awesome!!), so overall had the best summer ever! 
Started college which at first I was super nervous about and super anxious but when I settled in I made some awesome friends and two awesome best friends and a boyfriend! (If you guys are reading this then here is a shoutout to you- your awesome!) I can't believe it's been such an amazing year and it's nearly over!
So much has happened this year it's insane how fast it's all gone!

I have come so far this year, for example with riding, this same time last year I was trotting n a pony and now I am cantering and on big horse . that is just with riding, I have also come so far within the last year as I never thought I would be cantering or on a big horse instead of pony or even riding bareback as I had to face my fear of that (and again this was only thanks to my amazingly awesome friend!-if it wasn't for her I would of not even got on bareback! so she is reading this- THANK YOU! :) your amazingly awesome!) I have also come very far this year with managing my anxiety and my confidence has grown so much as I have talked to trusted friends and my best friends about it and I know they will be there if I have a bad panic attack or if I just need someone talk to if I feel abit anxious (so if my awesome friends and best friends are reading this then thank you for helping me and understanding and just being there for me,your amazing selves and I LOVE YOU!) I have come so far this year and done so many amazing things and I cant believe its nearly all over!

So since this year is nearly over and I have reminded myself of all the amazing things that have happened I though why not write my New Years Resolutions in this blog as well! Here they are:

1. Be more confident and try and believe in myself, (I don't mean to like be over confident coz that would be big-headed and vain), but as I lack confidence and whenever it comes to trying something new, I always end up persuading myself I can't! So try and believe I myself more and become more confident and try and not my anxiety get in they way! 

2. Become healthier and try and lose some weight! I need to become healthier I am so unhealthy right now like even as I am typing this I am eating Oreos!! 

3. Become more experienced and better at horse riding as I would love to be able to jump more then bottom pole on a horse and be able to confidently canter and confidently ride (again-not over confident and vain but just more confident then I am now as I probably have none or little confience in myself as a rider!)  this will also help with #1. As when I become more confident at riding then I will become more confident and happier and believe in myself! 

4. Take more pictures! I don't take enough pictures and I love photography but I just don't know why I don't take more photos! So I need to talk more pictures and especially of me and my friends and family!

5. Overcome some of my fears and challenge myself! I probably don't challenge myself as much as I could maybe as even though I am very stubborn and I don't like the idea of quitting but sometime if I am challenged and then I feel I can't and I think I cant hen I will quit. I so want to change this as I hate the fact I quit! I will change this! "quitters never win and winners never quit!"

I think that is all my New Years Resolutions and i am glad I thought about all the amazing things i have done this year and how far I have come. This has been a amazing year and I can't wait for 2015!
What are some of your New Years Resolutions?-Comment them down below!
Hope you have all had a very merry Christmas!
Love you all!
GeekyGirlOnline going offline xxxx


 

Saturday, 20 December 2014

Can you out grow best friends...?

Hi Guys! 
How are you all?-Hope you all have reason to make you smile today!

This isn't an advice blog post like my other blog posts so far as its abit different as its not an advice blog its just me expressing how I feel  as lately I have been feeling like me and my two best friends have become very distant and we don't see each other as I go a different college which sucks!

We have been best friends for six years now as we meet in year 6 as my sister went to the same school and I met them and then When I moved to high school instead of going to the same high school as my primary school friends (who I lost touch with and don't talk to anymore!) I moved to the same as my two best friends. So they were one of the reasons I moved schools. Ever since then I couldn't imagine my life without them they have been such amazing best friends and helped me through so many rough times! (And if they are reading this then, thank you! Love you two your awesome!), but recently I have started to notice how ever since college and leaving school we have barely seen each other and we don't really talk or text as much as we did! Ever since we left school I feel like we have been growing distant slowly and I fear that one day we will stop growing distant and will our friendship.

Even though, we said we wouldn't let college get in the way of our friendship I feel ever since we left school grown apart and become more distant. we use to see each other every day at school but now we don't really see each other but my two best friends are at one college and they see each other all the time but I haven't seen either of them since August. We use to constantly text one another all the time but now we probably only text each once a week-if that!

Have an of you ever felt like this that you and your best friends are fading apart? If so you have any advice for me or any one else feeling like this?-comment it down below I would really appreciate some advice on this!!
Thanks for reading!
Love you all!
GeekyGirlOnline going offline xxxx

 

Saturday, 13 December 2014

All about me...


Hi guys!
for his week's blog post I thought I would do something abit different. I thought I would do a all about me tag questions apart from as this an anonymous blog I won't be writing about stuff like my name etc but I will do most the questions so you guys reading this can get to know me abit better! :)

Appearance:

Natural Hair Colour: ash/dark blonde
Hair Length: Long ish , down to the top of my stomach but want to grow it to bottom of my back!
Eye Colour: sky blue
Best feature: Hair
Height: 5"4 and 1/2 (that 1/2 an inch makes all the difference)
braces?: yes I had braces from 10-14 years old.
Glasses: yes I wear glasses
Piercings?: yes!! I have my ear lobes and my left cartilage and I want double cartilage on left and right helix in the future.
tattoos?: no and don't want any.
right handed or left handed: right handed

Your "firsts?"
 
first best friend?: I remember having a best friend in like nursery/pre school and then all the way through primary we were still best friends and then after changing to a different high school we then lost touch and now we don't talk! :(
First award: I think my first award was in like year 7 for ice skating grade  1 and I only had to skate across the rink without falling over to get this. my first proper award though would of been in year 10 for being the most creative in art and I got a really cool prize of an A3 sketch pad and oil pastels!
First real vacation: proabably Disneyworld! I love Disneyworld(who doesn't lol)
first concert: Mcfly with my mum and sister!
First crush: a guy from primary who now hates and no hate him (long story! lol!)
First love: my dog- first real love: my boyfriend
 
Favourites:
 
Movie: anything Disney or with One direction in it or all of the harry potter films!
TV show: The Big Bang Theory ( I love Sheldon cooper!)
Colour: electric blue
Book: hmmmmm.. this is hard I love too many books- but probably Girl Online by Zoe Sugg or The Hunger Games series or This Song Will Save Your Life by Leila sales or The One Dollar Horse series by Lauren st John
Restaurant: Nandoes' and Pizza Express
shop: waterstones as I love books and then the works and primark and new look.
Song: too many songs! but at the minute I am loving "Do they know its Christmas time?"- Bandaid30 and the frozen soundtrack
magazine: horse and rider or mizz or photography
shoes: converse
 
 Currently?:
 
Feeling: tired and anxious
Single or taken: taken
Eating: oreos
Drinking: herbals teas (I am abit obsessed with herbal teas! lol)
Listening to: Mcbusted air guitar
Watching: youtube videos
wanting: to get college assessment done and to go horse riding tomorrow but I can't :(
wearing: my comfy grey pjs bottoms and my school leavers hoodie
 
Future:
Want children?: yes
Want to be married:  yes
Dream Job: Illustrator or photographer
Want to live where?: California or New York or London
 
Have you ever...?
 
Kissed a stranger?: nope
had alcohol?: yep of course!
smoked?: nope and cant and don't want to anyway lol
Runaway from home?: don't think so but I think I thought about it, planned, and even packed my bag and walked round my village then came home after about 1 hour and don't think my parents even noticed ( I was 14 years old roughly I think! lol!)
broken a bone: don't think o not yet.... *touch wood*
got an x-ray?: yep
had a heart break?: not yet...
cried at school?: yep like every day! (I hated school and was bullied-but I had awesome best friends to cheer me up!)
 
Do You Believe In:
 
God: No
Miracles: No
Love At First sight: No
Ghosts: No
Aliens: No
Soul Mates: Yes
Heaven: No
Hell: No
Kissing on The First Date: Why not?
Yourself: Not really...just sometimes..rarely....
 
Thank you for reading!
Hope you are all happy!
love you all!
GeekyGirlOnline going offline xxxx

 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 
 

Saturday, 6 December 2014

Making decisions.........

Hi guys!!!!

How did you all get on with your challenging yourself from last week's blog?-let me know in the comments please I would love to read them!- I did quite well this week as although I didn't go to a restaurant (where you go to the counter to order food instead of waiters coming to your table to Order food), this week as I planned as me and my friend are both busy with college. :( So instead me and my friend managed to fit in going to a coffee shop this week instead as that was quicker. Normally I would tell her what food I want and the money and let her order but instead I challenged myself and ordered for both myself and my friend! I was nervous at first but now I think was what I worried about?-Let me know in the comments about what fear you overcame this week-I would love to read them! 
 
This week's blog post is all about making decisions (and I mean big decisions like what college or university to go to not small stuff like what you want for dinner tonight lol!). I am writing about this as recently I have been thinking a lot about "my next step" or what I am going to do next September as currently I am doing a year art course at college as a started and then next year I was hoping to either a two year course a level up from that or a photography course as I love taking pictures of scenery or animals or anything and then editing them using photoshop. After that I kind of had a plan that I would go to do apprenticeships as I wasn't sure if I wanted to go to university as I wasn't confident my anxiety could handle that but recently I have been thinking a lot about everything and worrying as I didn't know anymore as my plans are changing. I have also written this blog post as I know that a lot of you guys, who are currently at your last year at high school, will be looking at which college to go to next September and which subjects to take for A level.-Since I know how hard this was for me last year I know how it is and I am writing this blog to give some advice on this. 

Tip 1

Talk to someone about your choices as this can help. It's best to talk to a teacher or school careers adviser as they will be use to students worrying about college so they will know how to mange and can give the more helpful advice. Try talking to your parents but I don't always understand and they have try and ouch you to do the subjects they want you to so but remember it's your choice! They can't force you to do the subject you don't want to do! Even if they don't understand you should try and talk to them. If your confused, then don't worry as talking you options through with someone can help. If you form want to talk to your parents or school teacher/careers adviser then you could even talk to your friends as this can help because they might just be as confused over college and options as you are so that will help just knowing your not the only one and if you didn't see a school teacher/careers adviser as you were to scariest I you friend might be feeling the same so you could go see the teacher or careers adviser together. 

Tip 2 

When looking at college open days only go o an open day if you know that college might be right for you and try to only go to a college if its pretty local to you as you don't want to have to be like me as I walk to my bus which takes fifteen minutes then I get a bus which is about a twenty minute bus journey and then its a twenty  train journey and ten minute walk to college which roughly takes about an hour in total to get to college and then do all this in reverse to get home. I would say that is probably the limit you don't want to have travel a long way. However, if you are like me and don't mind about the one hour of travel then go for it but I would say an hour would be the limit.

Tip 3

Before going t open days do your research. go on the internet and look at an online prospectus and have a look at what type of courses  the college do as some colleges might only do certain type of courses. For Example, I went to an open day for a college that only did sport and engineering just because it was local to me and they didn't do art as that was the course I wanted to do but I didn't know this before hand as I didn't do my research so I wasted time and I only went as it was a local college to me. Don't do this. Do research before college open days.

Tip 4

Don't leave going to open days and applying too late. It's best that as soon as you know which college you want then start applying as then you can then have an interview early and get it out the way so then you know you have a conditional place at the college so then you can concentrate on getting your GCSE results.

Tip 5

Have back up colleges. this is very important as you might only want to go to one college but its important to have a back up and a back up-back up as your first choice of college might decide to reduce class number or something might happen and you might not be able to go to that college so you would need a back up but then your first back up might have another problem that means you can't go to this college so then go with your second back up.

That's all the tips I have for now guys!
If any you have any tips for anyone else post them in comments please!
Good Luck to anyone who is applying for a college! Its tough now but it will be worth it! Hope t all goes well! let me know in the comments how applying for colleges goes and if you get in and what subjects you are wanting to do as I would love to read them!
God luck to anyone who is applying for university as well hope that goes well!
Don't forget to write about what fear you overcame in the comments I would love to read those!
Hope your all doing brilliantly and as excited for Christmas as I am!
Thank you for reading (if anyone is reading this!)
Love you all!!!!!!!!!!!
GeekyGirlOnline going offline xxxx

Saturday, 29 November 2014

Anxiety Advice

Hi there!
Welcome to my blog! Every Saturday, I will be uploading a new blog, and it could be an advice blog or a short story that I write in spare time or what I have been up to in the week or just whatever I feel like writing about. I decided to write this anonymously as I felt I needed somewhere I could just "be me" and not worry about people judging me.
This a very personal blog for me to write, and it is all very hard for me to put into words, but I will try my best as I thought this would be a good blog to start off with and if it might possibly help just one of you then this will all be worth it. Although, it will be hard for me to write this I wanted to write this as my first blog, as I hope this blog can help just knowing that you are not alone and there are things you can do to help panic attacks and anxiety.

What is anxiety?

Anxiety is the feeling of fear or panic. Most people feel anxious, panicky or fearful about situations in life, such as money problems or exams but often once the difficult situation is over, you feel better and calmer. Sometimes the feelings of fear or anxiety continue after the difficult situation or sometimes you may feel a stronger sense of fear than other people and this is when anxiety becomes a problem and can affect you doing every day things.

What is Social Anxiety?

Social anxiety is a persistant fear of social situations and interacting with other people,beyond simple shyness or the mild anxiety we all experience from time to time. It can disrupt normal life,interfere with social realtionships, lead to feeling of lonliness and isolation and negativity effect your studies and education.Social anxiety effects mainly teenager but some adults as well, and severe cases lead to panic attacks.

I have had anxiety for about two years ago now but I do think I was always quiet a nervous child. I have mainly social anxiety, which basically makes it really hard for me to talk to anyone but I also have anxiety so as well struggling to talk to anyone I also get panic attacks a lot and some are far worse then others and some are only mini as it depends how anxious I am feeling or what is going off in my life at the time as that is normally why they can be worse then others. Since I have realised about my anxiety over these past two years I have found some ways that help me when I am feeling anxious so even though this hard for me to share I am sharing this with you to help you understand that if you have anxiety then you are never alone and give some tip to deal with anxiety and panic attacks. Here are some tips on how to deal with anxiety/panic attacks that 
helped me and I hope helps you as well.


Tip 1
Talk to someone you trust. that someone could be parent or a best or close friend or even comment below ( you can comment anonymously or email me a comment at geekygirlonline@outlook.com) if you feel comfortable as then I will read you comment and reply to it so that I can help you! :)


Tip 2
Walk away from the situation and find somewhere you can be alone whether that is in a toilet cubical or outside. normally I prefer going outside as I prefer to be in fresh air as then I don't feel trapped but sometimes if I am in college in the middle of a class and feel anxious like I feel a panic attack coming o I just have to go to the toilet cubicles and have five minutes. Sometimes if I in a big group of people and I feel anxious then I excuse my self from group and walk outside and have a few minutes to calm down. Mostly like to be on my own in a panic attack but sometimes if I am in a big group, and there is one person within that group like my best friend who knows about my anxiety then I will ask that person to come outside with me for five minutes (without being rude to the rest of the group obviously), as I know that this person will help me get through this panic attack as they understand about your anxiety and can either talk it through with you why you were feeling anxious or distract you and take your mind of the anxiety.

Tip 3
Sometimes when I am in a situation that I can't escape from and get away and get some fresh air like being trapped on an aeroplane for hours without being able to escape as I get extremely panicky on aeroplanes, I then distract myself by watching films and listening to music and reading books and magazines or sleeping or talking to who ever I am travelling with, about anything that isn't about the travelling, whether that's what we are going to do on holiday or anything but the travelling.

Tip 4
Control your breathing. I always make sure I carry a paper bag anywhere with my as you never know when a panic attack will happen, as when you panic you take short panicky breathes which then you end up having unbalanced carbon dioxide to oxygen as this can course you to become light headed and to faint. having a paper bag can help as then it helps you control the carbon dioxide to oxygen and prevent you fainting.

Tip 5
When you have a panic attack you then start to think crazy thoughts but you can reassure yourself- " I am not going to die." "I will get through this."

Tip 6

Remember that none is judging you-they are probably just as anxious as you are. Everyone is insecure, just because they seem confident doesn't mean they aren't anxious and worrying and insecure about themselves.

Tip 7
Challenge yourself with situations that you feel anxious in-how ever terrifying it might be. This is something I need to start doing as I will confess something that if i find a social situation to make me feel very anxious and stressful and worrying, so instead of facing that fear and trying to overcome that worry I sometimes just walk away which at the time feels like the right thing but it isn't as then you are procrastinating thinking "next time that fear or worrying situation comes around I will overcome it," which isn't good!- and attempt it i am not the only who does this am I? Instead I challenge you all reading this to overcome one stressful, fearful situation (even if you don't have anxiety you can still overcome one fear this week with all of us),and then when you have overcome it
comment what and how you challenged yourself to overcome this stressful, fearful situation. I will be joining you as well as I am going to overcome my fear of ordering food in a restaurant that you go to order at the counter instead of them coming to take your order at you table. I will challenge myself to overcome this anxious situation later on in the week. I will update up all in next week's blog post on how well I did with this and you can all comment below telling me what and how you overcame this week. Let's challenge ourselves together. :)
Tip 8

If you are in a big group of friends, make sure you have at least one person in that group that knows about your anxiety and you feel comfortable around that person as this always helps me as if I am feeling anxious and feeling like I might possibly have a panic attack then I know I have one person who will help me out and make me feel less anxious.

Tip 9
If you don't feel up to talking to someone (tip 1) then try writing your feelings down every day like a journal/diary. Try it as this will help as then if you don't feel confident enough to talk to someone then try just writing things down as a diary as then your not just leaving feeling unresolved in your head as this can affect your sleeping as well as if you are stressed and worrying about something then it might affect you sleeping which isn't good as then you will be sleep deprived for the next day.
Here are some useful links of websites that might help you.
Anxiety Forum: www.anxietyforum.net
Hope these links help!
That is all the advice I have for now, I hoped it has helped and if you would like to share your own advice then comment below (you can comment anonymously or privately email me at geekygirlonline@outlook.com and I will read it and eventually reply back and try and help you.)
Remember you are never alone.
Don't forget to try and overcome your fear this week and then comment how and what you overcame and I will update you guys in next weeks blog post on how I overcame my fear.
:)
Thank you for reading (if anyone is reading).
Love you all!
GeekyGirlOnline  going offline xxxxxx